Guam

We are just beginning to measure, quantify and  describe the impact of technology on our socialization patterns and collective traits and habits.  I think about when Edison lit up the world, the impact. Then air travel and television. TV changed the family, they say, but what about the printing press? Books have just the same ability to individualize and isolate?  Perhaps the phone and the world wide web are most impactful in my life.

The Weather Channel mentions Guam. Technology informs me of a typhoon heading that way. I’m worried about Guam Baby.

Late one night a baby from Guam left me a message on my answering machine. I knew they were a baby, about two or three from their voice, and from Guam by the area code. Now with mobiles you can call a number from anywhere and it will show the Guam area code, or New Jersey or whatever. I can call my friend in Haddam and be in Paris and it still shows Connecticut.

But I like to think that because of the Area Code and the fact that it was at least 11pm on the West Coast that the baby was probably on Guam. and it was the next day even so they were living in the future.

I couldn’t understand a word which I assumed to be Chamorro, but it could have been an Indian dialect or Finnish or Aleut. We assume if a person is in Colorado, they’re Coloradoan. Maybe their German and just visiting.  Once in Manhattan I stopped at a Duane Reade on 34th and Fifth avenue right next to the Empire State Building. I was going to Shea Stadium and had two friends with me dressed in full Mets regalia.  I come out and a whole bunch of Japanese tourists are photographing my friends as the perfect juxtaposition of New York elements. I didn’t have the heart to tell them my splendidly attired sports friends were from Connecticut. Baseball is huge in Japan, but who knows, they could have been Canadian.

The point is the Guam Baby call was a wrong number, but the baby made a lasting impression. I hope that now Guam Child was safe.

I get wrong texts all the time. But the best was when my neighbors gave me a used answering machine. Remember those? And everyone had cutesy messages.

Please leave a number, we’ll return you’re call. And; I’m not home right now so if you’re planning on robbing my house, this would be a good time.

Well used answering machine had the purest corniest version of phone sex I ever heard. Nothing dirty but while he was out, she left a message;

Hey you, my big strong man of mine. Big muscle man. Teddie booboo. They were stoopid in love.  I was nauseous.